So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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