11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
