So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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