you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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