And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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