we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
You were trust falling into bushes
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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