it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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