seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
