i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
