It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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