Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
