and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
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i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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