Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize