Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
