He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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