Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.