Everything about him screamed your future.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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