Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
