sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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