Who did Billy Mays play for?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Come on in and take your pants off
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize