I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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