ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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