He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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