i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm at about main and main street
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
