I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
