lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
What a dumb baby whore.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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