I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he was CRYING into my vagina
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
