Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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