i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Come on in and take your pants off
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
