You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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