His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize