I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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