This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
