hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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