Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
