Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
