You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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