I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
