Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
