i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Randomize
