I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
You brought string cheese to the strip club
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
