Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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