How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
