I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
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