He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize