I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize