So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
