idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
