put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Randomize
