God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
