The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize